:P

I made my friend read cupcakes today.

He's really angry.

Sexist People

I hate sexist people.

Especially when they are girls. It's just so infuriating to hear them say something like, "Girls are the intelligence and boys are mostly like 'crazy robots, pew pew pew', you know."

I MEAN, WHAT?

What proof do you have that ALL guys are stupid and unfocused? NONE! EVER HEARD OF ALBERT EINSTEIN, IDIOT? PERHAPS STEPHEN HAWKING? MAYBE CHARLES DARWIN?

THEY ARE MEN WHO DISCOVERED SOMETHING IMPORTANT, THROUGH INTELLECT.

It's also really annoying to hear sexist jokes. Some by women again,

Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one. 

Q. Why can't men get mad cow disease?
A. Because they're all pigs.

Q. Why do men like smart women?
A. Opposites attract.

NO! NO, NO, NO, NONONONONONONO NO NO NONONONO NO NO

How would you like it if I turned into a sexist guy, and talked like this, "completely boring, JUST LIKE WOMEN OHHHHH" or like this, "If I had a penny for every interesting thing a girl said, I would be broke."

See how much of a douche I am now?

Seriously, stop the sexism. It's uncalled for.

Fellow guys included.

BEST POEM EVER

I'm posting twice today to make up for yesterday!

Enjoy a poem!

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
Shit is Brown
So is Poop


That's the same Thing
I guess that won't do
I must have to change
A thing or two


How about something
Along the lines of this
It's a new poem,
with a different kick


Roses are black
when they're dead
and the violets too
like your face OHHOooo


Perfect rhymes
Fit the poem just right
Don't you agree,
uh... black knight?


Is this even a poem anymore?
Probably not
I don't think it was
From the beginning spot


That sort of rhymed, I guess
Perhaps it could be better
Maybe I should write a poet
for advice, in a letter!


...

I trolled Animal Crossing

Sorry for not posting yesterday! I couldn't use my computer D:

Anyways, since I wasn't able to use my computer, I played Animal Crossing. BEST GAME EVER. Animal Crossing is where you basically a game involving going around your little town place full of a bunch of animals, and engrossing yourself in various activities there. It's in real time too, so that's pretty interesting.

Here's how my game went. Funny thing is that everything I did in this is true, and I did this all alone. Wow.

GAME START-UP - I started up the game for the first time in about 3 years, to find my sister's abandoned town. I deleted it. She doesn't play anyways, and frankly is she did I could care less. Then I get onto character creation, which takes place on a bus. There's this guy named 'Rover' or something, either way he's a cat. Don't you go being catist now, son, I'll let you know he's a very nice person... er, cat. He asks me my name, which I put Dr.eZoma because I'm original, my town, which I put as FarEast, then asked me a bunch of other stuff I don't really give a shit about, and then I was off! Based on my answers, I was given a generic character.

FIRST MOMENTS - Based on some advice I was given, I went to the town hall first. I got more advice. SO, I went to get a house and found a really nice one by the beach, and that's what I picked. That's when I met Tom Nook. He told me that in order to pay off my house I had to work for him, which led to me beginning the shittiest job in the history of the known universe.

WORKING FOR TOM NOOK/THE TROLLINGZ - My first job was to meet everyone in the town. That's not called a job, bro. That's called putting people on meaningless tasks that will do nothing to advance your business. I did it anyways, though, money's money. I met a couple of fairly nice people, a total douche named 'Chief' and my future bro Amelia. I got back, and I got a delivery task. I finished it in about 30 seconds. Then I got the task to write a letter to Jeremiah, some frog guy. He's okay. I believe my letter went something like this, 'TANKS FURBING BRO LOL U SUK'. I sent the letter (apparently I was slow...), and I delivered another package. That's when the real trolling started; For my next job I was asked to write an advertisement in the town square for Tom Nook's store.

Advertisement Part 1 - tom nook molestered me wat a shithead
Advertisement Part 2 - tom nook touched me in my special place and wouldn't stop
Advertisement Part 3 - BIG OL' DICK 8--------------)
Advertisement Part 4 - IM TOM NOOK I MOLESTER CHILDREN LOL


The town just let's you write stuff up on that board. Wow. So, after I wrote Tom Nook's advertisement (which he told me not to say anything bad about him on it) I delivered a couple more packages and I was done! Bout' time too, that job sucked.

TROLOLOLOLOLOL - After finding out you can send letter's, I went fricking crazy. I wrote one to Jeremiah, which went something like this,

"I NO U R GAY I CEN TEL BY URZ SHURT ALSO I SHIT IN UR GARDEN THEN RAPPED U"


Another one to Chief,

"U R A DOUCHEBAG LOLOLOL NOW YOUR PROB GOIN TOS REWARRRDDDZZ ME BECAZ U R A MEMB OF A TON FIL OF FUCKTARDS"


I forgot to mention, they REALLY like letters. They must not read them though, because my insane virtual trolling is somewhat true. After I wrote those letters, I bought a net and went around hitting people on the head. I made everyone as angry as possible, but when I made Amelia angry I felt bad because she's my bro. SO I WROTE HER A LETTER,

"SORRYZ I HITZ UR HEAD LOLOLOLOLOL SARCASM IS FUNNY"


Then I made some shirts, because I found a shop where you can put them on display. The first one I made was one that said "FUCK" on the front, and "U" on the back. I was proud of that one. Then I talked to Amelia who said that she wished more designs by local designers came out. LOOKS LIKE THE PENI SHIRT IS GOING VIRAL. It was orange with a badly drawn... you guessed it, on the front, and then a butt on the back. I'm really good at this, aren't I? I made one more shirt that was a chest with a... yep, sticking out.

Damn, I have a gross sense of humor.


Then I was done!







OKAY, IT'S OFFICIAL. Worst blog ever.

REVIEW: Forever in Black (LOL)

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12 VIEWS VIDEO SPECIAL

WOAH! 12 PAGE VIEWS? THAT'S LIKE 120,000,000 BUT ONLY MOVED DOWN 7 DECIMAL PLACES!

OKAY,  a couple videos to show you guys here today. Check em' out, they are hilarious... well if you have a sense of humor like mine, that is. Which you probably do, or you would've stopped reading this blog already- unless you're new? WOAH! WITH 12 VIEWS ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

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"What Happened to Mona Lisa's Smile?"

I was reading the comic section today, when I came across the kid section. This is what I saw:

The text reads "What happened to Mona Lisa's Smile?"














Now, I am quite aware this in the kiddie section. This means that all drawings are generally bad and it's basically just a coloring book in the newspaper. HOWEVER, seeing how this is the artist's interpretation of the Mona Lisa, possibly the most famous painting by renaissance master Leonardo DiVinci, I had this thought run through my mind in the form of a letter I would write to the author about it-

"Hey, author. Real good job on Mona Lisa. I'm glad you captured the famous look of Mona Lisa's misshapen head, with the famous bald spot directly on the front! How the hair manages to be 
BEHIND her forehead REALLY shows off her bald spot. You know, that's really fucking good. Her nose curls up in the unrealistic manner clearly shown in DiVinci's painting, and I couldn't be more impressed! ESPECIALLY WITH THE EYELASHES! I mean, the eyelashes sticking out almost filling the length from her eyes to the edges of her head really works out, possibly giving an edge that even DiVinci didn't have. OH OH! THE COMPLETELY GREEN LANDSCAPE BEHIND HER! Oh, I just love it! Keep up the good work author, and please continue to make modern masterpieces in 5 minutes. 


Sincerely, DreZoma"